CK Tools Giveaway - Tell us what your most essential tool is to enter

[Electrical2go]

We are giving away a set of
CK Tools - Triton XLS Screwdrivers
worth £20.00

For your chance to win, simply comment on this thread with Your favourite Sparky joke. (Keep it clean-ish)
The professional quality Triton XLS Screwdriver is designed with tip type marking for easy identification, a large soft grip tri-lobe handle for exceptional comfort and high torque turns. The handle is injection moulded directly to blade giving the ultimate bond for increased reliability and durability. Anti roll flats to prevent the screwdriver rolling off sloping surfaces. The blade is manufactured from a toughened alloy steel for excellent durability and precision machined tips to reduce the risk of tip breakage.

The winner will be announced on 10th May.
(Please note: this competition is also running on both facebook and Twitter too,
so add more than one joke for extra chances to win).
(UK entries Only)
After we announce the result, if the winner does not respond within 5 days, another winner shall be chosen.
​

 

[ruston]

Yes and he is back on a desert island now too.

 

[Charlie_]

His best mate Murphy is just as bad;
He’s too scared to fly long haul incase the plane runs out of fuel and they all get stuck up in the sky

 

[telectrix]

paddy the pilot is approaching Shannock Airport when he gets a Master Caution warning on the display of his Air Fungus 737. he radois in to the control tower with a pan,pan,pan, and tells them he has a problem..
control tower....."Paddy, what is your height and location?"

Paddy....... " Oi'm 5ft 9 and sitting in the front seat"

 

[Charlie_]

What’s the difference between God and an electrician?

God doesn’t think he’s an electrician.

 

[pirate]

Posh bloke parking his bentley and a tramp raps on his window..
"Oi, guv, spare a shilling for a cup of tea?"
Posh bloke: "Neither a borrower nor a lender be...Shakespeare"
Tramp: " C**t!..D H Lawrence"

 

[Charlie_]

We don’t serve the likes of you in here!

Time traveler walks into a bar.

 

[Rpa07]

We don’t serve the likes of you in here!

Time traveler walks into a bar.

You’re on fire Charlie - I’ll imagine you are glad the rule ‘only one entry’ doesn’t apply in this competition!

 

[Charlie_]

You’re on fire Charlie - I’ll imagine you are glad the rule ‘only one entry’ doesn’t apply in this competition!

Hahaha yes definitely!
I think you may have realized by now that I need some new screwdrivers

 

[telectrix]

Hahaha yes definitely!
I think you may have realized by now that I need some new screwdrivers

see post #5.

 

[Charlie_]

see post #5.

I thought it had to be related to the sparky trade?
I could tell the funniest joke of all time but we would all die laughing..
It’s just too dangerous

 

[Charlie_]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs help with luggage.
‘No thanks, I’m traveling light’

What does a photon and @pirate have in common?
They both travel at c.

 

[telectrix]

I thought it had to be related to the sparky trade?
I could tell the funniest joke of all time but we would all die laughing..
It’s just too dangerous

 

[Charlie_]

Haha that’s the one!
Classic

 

[ferg]

Can't live without tool is my Hultafors Elk electricians knife.

Cheap as chips and suits me down to the ground.

 

[Rpa07]

Couldn’t live without long nose pliers, though . . . . at ELEX yesterday I did see a snub nosed pair of Knipex that quite took my fancy!

 

[Samuel Joseph]

When my customers realise what a bad electrician I am, they are truly shocked.

 

[telectrix]

View attachment 49028 Couldn’t live without long nose pliers, though . . . . at ELEX yesterday I did see a snub nosed pair of Knipex that quite took my fancy!

too short. can't reach them deeply buried singles you need to grab and trace. you need these:

 

[Rpa07]

Looks like they have their own condom for safe probing!
It’s more for terminals and doubling over wires on second fix. I’ve always got long nose, though those are very long nosed!

too short. can't reach them deeply buried singles you need to grab and trace. you need these:

 

[Charlie_]

I have just thought up another one;

Whilst Michael Faraday was carrying out an experiment somebody tried to distract him with a very offensive joke.

Didn’t work though, there was just no shocking him

 

[rapparee]

Looks like they have their own condom for safe probing!
It’s more for terminals and doubling over wires on second fix. I’ve always got long nose, though those are very long nosed!

Deep probing?

I've been sent this three times yesterday, it must be doing the rounds