Stuck in a lift, again...

[pirate]

I am bored tonight, so i would love to hear from you all.
You are stuck in a lift.
The engineers are working on it.
You will be there for 2 hours.
Who would you choose as your companion for that duration?
And why?
And...there is no CCTV in there!
To narrow the field a bit, you cannot choose David Attenborough or Carol Kirkwood.
Let's hear from you!

 

[DPG]

I'd pick a better lift engineer. One that can fix it in ten minutes.

 

[pirate]

Good point DPG! However, you are there to enjoy yourself...and i can't see you doing that with a lift engineer...but what do I know?

 

[DPG]

Good point DPG! However, you are there to enjoy yourself...and i can't see you doing that with a lift engineer...but what do I know?

Maybe Carol Kirkwood is a qualified lift engineer?

 

[pirate]

I accept it might take some engineering expertise to provide her with the requisite "lift", but as i said at the start, she's off-limits!

 

[ruston]

Would have to be Mohamed Ali or Billy Connolly

 

[Baddegg]

Why can’t we have 2 people pirate?.....I’d be done with first after 2 mins?

 

[DPG]

What about the blonde one out of ABBA? Benny I think his name was

 

[Moley]

I must be getting old. I had to look up who Carol Kirkwood is.

 

[GBDamo]

Ed Ball, two hours should be long enough to deliver all the slaps that his smarmy mush deserves.

 

[Silly Sausage]

I am bored tonight, so i would love to hear from you all.
You are stuck in a lift.
The engineers are working on it.
You will be there for 2 hours.
Who would you choose as your companion for that duration?
And why?
And...there is no CCTV in there!
To narrow the field a bit, you cannot choose David Attenborough or Carol Kirkwood.
Let's hear from you!

If I wanted to drive myself insane, it'd have to be essex.

 

[littlespark]

Tom hanks Schindler character. He knows a few things about lifts.

Oh... Schindler's LIST.... not LIFTS.

If I wanted to drive myself insane, it'd have to be essex.

Joey or David?

 

[JK-Electrical]

I must be getting old. I had to look up who Carol Kirkwood is.

The b*****d builder who didn't pay me. Hopefully our encounter would be in the morning and I would've had king prawn vindaloo for supper the night before washed down with six or seven pints of Guinness.

 

[ruston]

If I wanted to drive myself insane, it'd have to be essex.

You would be ok , the sun tan lotion would sedate you

 

[Dan]

I'd have santa claws and have a word with him about this coming Christmas present because last year the hoverboard nearly broke my neck. And I didn't say I wanted that for Christmas.

 

[pirate]

Would anyone like Rachel Riley off Countdown?
I mean she's very clever, so she might be able to fix the lift?
and if not...well, she's one for intellectual conversation, surely?

 

[pirate]

Baddegg...clearly you are a stud!
Me, more of a partition...

 

[pirate]

Very sad lack of imagination here...Billy Connolly the best choice so far!
Years ago, in a forum far away, I posed the question:
How do you like to eat a Mars Bar?

Then I went to bed...
next morning all 300 replies had been deleted by the moderators, and i got a severe ticking-off...

Different times...

 

[pirate]

I never realised Mick Jagger was so popular!

 

[pirate]

Or Marianne Faithful...for that matter...

 

[JK-Electrical]

I'd have santa claws and have a word with him about this coming Christmas present because last year the hoverboard nearly broke my neck. And I didn't say I wanted that for Christmas.

 

[Baddegg]

Why can’t we have 2 people pirate?.....I’d be done with first after 2 mins?

@d

Baddegg...clearly you are a stud!
Me, more of a partition...

that included the cigarette and awkward conversation...

 

[GMES]

God you lot are Boring.
Rita ora, Katy Perry, Maggie siff, Halle berry

 

[Midwest]

Nelson Mandela. But now he’s no more Linda Lusardi, as she’s been avoiding my letters for the last 40 years.

 

[Carl S]

The one person I wouldn’t want with me is the lift engineer.

One place I worked at had just one person trained in lift rescue, I was that person and I’m stuck in the lift. It took three hours for a guy from Otis to arrive on site, by then the battery in my phone is going flat and I’m going loopy.

The end result was all of the companies electricians were trained in lift rescue.

 

[Midwest]

The one person I wouldn’t want with me is the lift engineer.

One place I worked at had just one person trained in lift rescue, I was that person and I’m stuck in the lift. It took three hours for a guy from Otis to arrive on site, by then the battery in my phone is going flat and I’m going loopy.

The end result was all of the companies electricians were trained in lift rescue.

You never seen Die Hard?

 

[Bobster]

The one person I wouldn’t want with me is the lift engineer.

One place I worked at had just one person trained in lift rescue, I was that person and I’m stuck in the lift. It took three hours for a guy from Otis to arrive on site, by then the battery in my phone is going flat and I’m going loopy.

The end result was all of the companies electricians were trained in lift rescue.

We once had the elevator out of action.

I needed to take a 70kg propane tank up 6 stories to the top of the stack for the gas analyser.

Lift tech allowed me to stand on top of the lift with the gas canister and drive with the manual overrides located on the roof of it.

Safe as houses.

Production is king.

 

[telectrix]

We once had the elevator out of action.

I needed to take a 70kg propane tank up 6 stories to the top of the stack for the gas analyser.

Lift tech allowed me to stand on top of the lift with the gas canister and drive with the manual overrides located on the roof of it.

Safe as houses.

Production is king.

where there'a will, there's a way relative.

 

[Carl S]

I fitted car top controls to a Wadsworth lift.

My guaranteed way of getting the plant manager out of the way was ask him to go on the car top. I’d conned him once and took him up to the top floor, the look on his face as we got near the top made my day.

 

[telectrix]

stuck in a lift with Valerie leon. MMMMM.

 

[Spoon]

Anyone who was delivering a big selection of cheesecakes to the 'Cheesecake tasting convention'

 

[MJPD29]

Jennifer Aniston. And hope to god I'm on my 'A' game with the smooth talking.

 

[Squid]

Jennifer Aniston. And hope to god I'm on my 'A' game with the smooth talking.

lol Chelski supporter with a Belfast accent, not a chance in hell.......

 

[MJPD29]

lol Chelski supporter with a Belfast accent, not a chance in hell.......

Never know, she might have a soft spot for the accent

 

[Squid]

Never know, she might have a soft spot for the accent

and someone who believes and fairies and pink unicorns........

 

[DPG]

Anybody as long as it's not someone orange off a reality TV show.

 

[Spoon]

and someone who believes and fairies and pink unicorns........

Next you will be trying to imply that there is no Father Christmas..

 

[Spoon]

Anybody as long as it's not someone orange off a reality TV show.

Oompa-Loompa's have been on a reality TV show??? Who knew...

 

[Squid]

A young female delivery rider with food and booze........

 

[Spoon]

A young female delivery rider with food and booze........

'Young' is all relative.. .

 

[Squid]

'Young' is all relative.. .

Younger than me is young.............

 

[Lister1987]

A drunken Rachel Riley with no morals....or underw....hell, no clothes

 

[Spoon]

Younger than me is young.............

55 then?? . . .

 

[Squid]

A drunken Rachel Riley with no morals....or underw....hell, no clothes

She is pregnant I got stuck in a lift with her in March........

 

[Lister1987]

I'll take sloppy seconds, am sure once you get past the few inches you had, she's as tight as the day is long

Besides, shes got more than one opening to play with

 

[Squid]

55 then?? . . .

Nope I am 55 so it would be 54 no wonder you are an electrician as maths isn't your strongest attribute ;o)))))

 

[Squid]

I'll take sloppy seconds, am sure once you get past the few inches you had, she's as tight as the day is long

Besides, shes got more than one opening to play with

You going to clean out the wax in her ears with your todger?

 

[Lister1987]

I'll take it where I can get it, You never forget the screams from a todger perforated eardrum

 

[pirate]

Rachel, if you are reading this thread, please be assured that I mentioned your name as a candidate for a companionable and extremely attractive temporary prisoner, and i do not condone such lewd and libidinous comments...

 

[Silly Sausage]

Rachel, if you are reading this thread, please be assured that I mentioned your name as a candidate for a companionable and extremely attractive temporary prisoner, and i do not condone such lewd and libidinous comments...

He's from Runcorn.
Farmyard animals are fair game to that lot.