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[Kamikaze]

Kamikaze: "Doctor, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home."
Doctor: "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."
Kamikaze: "Is it common?"
Doctor: "It's not unusual."

 

[Kamikaze]

What is more useful, the sun or the moon?


The moon, because the moon shines at night when you want the light, whereas the sun shines during the day when you don't need it.

 

[Kamikaze]

Why did Mr Ohm marry Mrs Ohm?

Because he couldn't resistor!

 

[Kamikaze]

What is the technical defect in a female body?

The entertainment area is constructed very near the sewerage system.

 

[BillyTheSparks]

Chaps,

We have a jokes thread in the pub.

Please keep it in there.

Ta.

But at the moment I'm not alowed in.....
Any chance of a key???

 

[Kamikaze]

Don’t do it Billy, the initiation ceremony alone will make your eyes water…..lol

 

[BillyTheSparks]

Don’t do it Billy, the initiation ceremony alone will make your eyes water…..lol

hahahaha. Is it really as bad as I've heard??

 

[Kamikaze]

Let’s put it this way. They might not have any skeletons in their closets but they have gimp masks for sure.

 

[BillyTheSparks]

Something like these??

 

[RogertheBodger]

Don’t do it Billy, the initiation ceremony alone will make your eyes water…..lol

Is that the one involving the 1000v Megger and the earth spike?

 

[RogertheBodger]

Or the one involving a 1000v Megger and a wooden toilet seat?

 

[Kamikaze]

View attachment 5278View attachment 5277

Something like these??

That's "The Arms" best seller...lol

 

[RogertheBodger]

Something like these??

You know how these initiations end up - it's the hat

 

[Kamikaze]

What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?

Hold on to your nuts. This is no ordinary blow job!

 

[Kamikaze]

An electrician and apprentice are working in a house. The apprentice is hammering the floorboards down. He picks up a nail, realises it's upside down & throws it away. He carries on doing this until the electrician says; "Why are you throwing them away?" The appentice replies; "Because they're upside down!" The electrician says; "You idiot,save 'em for the ceiling."

 

[Kamikaze]

Someone try this at Heathrow airport and then post the video on the forum please.....lol

[video=youtube;EUEcaAc6LC8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUEcaAc6LC8[/video]

 

[Kamikaze]

Over five thousand years ago Moses said to the children of Israel : "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the promised land."
Nearly 50 years ago Harold Wilson said: "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a camel, this is the promised land."
Then Gordon Brown stole our shovels, taxed our asses, raised the price of camels, and mortgaged the promised land.
Now Cameron has raised my fuel bills and increased Vat to 20%, I got so drunk & depressed last night I called the Samaritans, they diverted my call to a call centre in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

 

[Kamikaze]

A proper brown pants moment there. I don't speak any Russian but I can guess what they are saying.


[video=youtube;eebBjs507Yc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=eebBjs507Yc[/video]

 

[Kamikaze]

By accident I stumbled across the pilots view of the flyby video I posted yesterday. Thought I share it with my Ohmies.


[video=youtube;qZ5TNmI_mEk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZ5TNmI_mEk[/video]

 

[The Cavalry]

Nice to see that the RAF is not the only nut jobs!!