Things an Electrician would never say

[simpson93]

i love long hard days without breaks

 

[mike2790]

here love, lick this and tell me if it tingles.

 

[DurhamSparky]

yes MR electric are the best around here!! best not use a cowboy like me!! lol

 

[Wiredspark]

Professional? Of course sir!!! But before you start telling me what work you need done, let me get my smoke packet out. I need something to write on.

 

[Kamikaze]

i love long hard days without breaks

Breaks are for continental wuzzies. Real electricians work right through.

 

[Scott F]

Enough already Lets Talk About Jesus

 

[Kamikaze]

I heard the difference between a capacitor and a resistor was in the taste. Is this true young apprentice?

 

[knasher]

"It's not only the price that will shock you............"

 

[JD6400]

Sorry if I do offend , moderators but we do occasionally use this one but only with our longest standing clients that are friends as well !

" We are a clear and transparent company , as in our name - DP Electrical Ltd . DP stands for Deep Penetration, because when you've had us you know you've been shafted!

 

[Kamikaze]

Good thing you weren’t here 20 minutes ago Sir. Boy, you really would have been pi55ed. Is it alright we used a couple of your ------’s? We’ll pay you back!

 

[andyemms]

"The way things are heading, it's just going to get 'harder'. Now, How do you want to pay?"

 

[andyemms]

No sorry mate, I don't do discount for cash, it still goes through the books....

 

[ipd1961]

Of course I am fully qualified. I did a 5 week online course

 

[RWJ]

Of course I am fully qualified. I did a 5 week online course

I did one and spent the first 3 weeks using the wrong end of the screwdriver!! Now I'm fully qualified and experienced!!!

 

[Kamikaze]

I'm enjoying my mid-life crisis. I've spend most of my money on women & beer. The rest I just wasted! Any chance of paying us up front for the work that’s got to be done madam?

 

[simpson93]

me no speak english.

 

[Kamikaze]

Bad planing on your part does not necessarily constitute an automatic emergency on my part madam.

 

[Kamikaze]

Yes Sir, you can talk to the electrician in charge, but I don’t think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I’m the electrician in charge.

 

[Paul.M]

Ok, who the bloody hell put kamikaze in charge?

 

[BOROROBBO]

I doubt that wall ive just smashed up is asbestos........ but i'll let you know in 30 years or so!